Reader, I have been busy. Here are some of the positions I have applied for:
Well Analyst, Women’s Football Coach, Data Uploading Executive, Asbestos Consultant, High Volume Data Entry Clerk, Chair in Experimental Particle Physics, Data Entry Administrator, Drug Safety Administrator, Collections Advisor, Deputy Food and Beverage Controller, URGENT! Customer Sales Advisor, Account Manager…
Account Manager! Yes, I had a response to that one. Danielle is a Sales Operations Manager who likes to spell her name in two different ways. She responded by asking the question a lot of people ask after they’ve seen the cv.
Thought 1: She is under the impression that the cv is some kind of ‘joke’ and is registering her dis-taste/belief that I sent it to her.
Thought 2: She can’t believe how good the cv is.
I’m an optimistic kind of fellow:
It is important to get the level of dress right in interviews – I did not want to turn up wearing knitware and boaters if the occasion called for a step collared single-button suit and risk making the kind of first impression that would have be difficult to change with my arresting and to-the-point answers to her interview questions.
After reading this the rest of Friday night’s caretaking shift was hard. Hard because I was hurt by Danniii’s tone. Hard because I didn’t know what ‘trolling’ was. I was so distracted I could not give the first floor toilets the 100% concentration they require and deserve. I had to take measures:
And, after nearly a week of lip-biting, this:
Nothing yet, but here’s to hoping.
Hmmmm, lets see…
Freight Account Manager, Automotive Service Advisor, Advertising Field Sales Maternity Cover, Buyer – Knitware, Executive Jet Broker, Spa Hotel Receptionist, TEMPORARY SWIMMING TEACHER, Dance/Cheerleading/ Gymnastics teacher, HAVE YOU SOLD TRAINING COURSES??, B2B Sales Executive, Telesales Manager, Telesales Executive, Lead Generator, Powersports Sales Manager, IT Expert,
IT Expert! Yes, I’d almost forgotten.
Isn’t Simon nice! Nice doesn’t get me a job though does it? Amongst all the things mother taught me she taught me never to take ‘no’ for an answer until you’re blood curdlingly sure it is the final answer. And so:
Mother was right again! Two folders! Success! Sort of. I mean he’s not called. But it’s something, right?
* I am about as pleased with the standard of proofreading in these emails as you are.
On to three?